I love this story and want to encourage you to keep writing. You've a distinct talent and I've been totally sucked in by your dialog, the settings, and the emotional aspects of it.
I particularly liked the bits in the 1st paragraph, where he's making small motions on her skin; trying to telegraph his desire and affection for her. That was a very, very nice touch.
Congrats!!
the_scribbler
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Thank you and please ignore any and all flames.Have fun and keep up the great work that you have done. |
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pstibbonsSigned | Chapter : 3 | Date : 16/10/07
All very weepy and fluffy and stuff so far. What's new? Are you going to give Mr and Mrs Granger major roles beyond that of 'anonymous Muggle parents'?
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Author Feedback: Dude, watch the snark there. I never said it'd be an action/adventure fic. The Grangers may have a big part, to be honest I don't know. I've only written up to maybe chapter 7, and the part does kind of get big, but tbh, I don't know if it'll satisfy you. Maybe you won't like the next chapter or so then since it's weepy too. Cause, you know, Harry only has to listen to his parents' and Dumbledore's wills be read. But no reason to be at all weepy. |
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pstibbonsSigned | Chapter : 2 | Date : 16/10/07
Two deaths?
Hope we dont have to worry much about pussyfooting about Weasel feelings here... |
Author Feedback: We do see them next chapter, and I'll say this now...run and hide. They're rather angry. It gets really tense in the chapter and if I'm not mistaken, there's a cliffhanger at the end...
yeah two deaths. The only one that's really monumental is Dumbledore's though. Shaklebolt, for the purpose of this, isn't *strike that* wasn't a big character. |
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CateagleSigned | Chapter : 3 | Date : 16/10/07
Heh, that's a most delightful-sounding way to wake up, even if nothing happened 'tween them. I thought the morning sessions went well, overall, even if they didn't find anything as they did get more used to working together as a team. The afternoon at Gringott's started to get most intereting and I'll wager it gets -real- interesting in the next chapter if there's Albus' will in addition to those of Harry's parents. A question, if I may, has Sirius' will been dealt with yet? If not, that's going to make for a very long afternoon at Gringott's and one rather bemused and bewildered Harry at the end, accompanied by one likely shell-shocked Hermione as she realizes what power and resources he does have. |
Author Feedback: It does sound most delightful doesn't it?  Gringotts does get more interesting, if only because of the wills. I think Sirius' will was dealt with in the summer before Sixth Year and Harry just didn't get to go, I may be wrong since I've only read the book once (when it came out) but that's what I'm going by for the purpose of the story. *shrugs* I just do the writing part, I don't think up the plot.
Thanks for the review!  |
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striderSigned | Chapter : 2 | Date : 10/10/07
well I must say that I'm terribly glad that you're reposting this. I do believe I remember reading this earler and thought that it had quite a bit of potential. Bravo! Ear Ear!!
keep em coming! cheerio! |
Author Feedback: I'm glad that someone remembers this. I'll warn you now, not much has changed from what I had up. I'm mostly clearing details up, fixing grammer and technical errors, and making it flow better. After Chapter 6 or 7, everything is new. I haven't even written the entire update yet, so you'll be as surprised as me!  Nice to know you liked it so much!
Thanks! |
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LindeeUnsigned | Chapter : 2 | Date : 10/10/07
This chapter seems a bit rushed, there was no descrition of anything that caught my eye. It may be too forgetful of a chapter. |
Author Feedback: It's not really supposed to be memorable though. This chapter has no purpose except to pass time in this universe (and to get me updating) because the muses didn't feel (SPOILER FOR NEXT CHAPTERS) that it was time to read the wills, which should happen soon. To be honest, I didn't like this chapter much either, but I write what the muses decide I write, if only because they know the story better than I.
I am glad you took time to tell me though. It means a lot to me, and I'll advise them to not be so rushy next time around. |
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CateagleSigned | Chapter : 1 | Date : 03/10/07
Well, that's definitely an interesting start. *chuckle* It's certainly starting things off with a "Bang"! I suspect Tonks is going to catch some criticism for leaving them unprotected, there. In the meantime, Hermione has now seen the poor shape Harry's in and I suspect she'll be taking steps short; I rather doubt that either Albus or Petunia will appreciate some of those.
AN excellent start that's got me looking forward to the next chapter. |
Author Feedback: Thanks! I try to start off things interesting I'll say this much, Harry does leave but only because he a) wants to and b) He finds out something that makes him want to go somewhere else...Does that make sense? If not, you'll find out what I mean... yep the next update will be this coming up Tuesday. And on the Albus part, I honestly haven't thought about that because this is Book 6 compliant. Maybe I'll pull a madscientist and bring him back from the dead...*goes off to find a muse to ask about this*
Oh and thanks for the review! |
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MikeSigned | Chapter : 1 | Date : 03/10/07
Well, you certainly have my attention! I can't wai tto see where you're going to take this story. You're off to a great start. |
Author Feedback: You and me both! *sheepish* yeah I don't really know where it's going either. I know up to chapter 7, but beyond that I have no clue. I write what the muse wants me to write...unless she's being eaten by plot bunnies... |
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