Nice start; I hope you do manage to carry through on this to its completion, so far it's well written.

When I started to read your story, I wonder why so few reviews. It was very well written, long chapters, not much of a plotting but still interesting- but then I think I finally understood.

This story seems to be much more about Harry and Ginny than Harry and Hermione, even if these two are together. You write as if Harry cared a lot more for Ginny than Hermione.

I'm sorry but I don't know if I want to read more of this.

Not a bad story at all. But there are a couple of points I want to raise.

First the beautiful/ugly thing. I'm sure you didn't intend it but you make Hermione seem very plain. Remember in GoF at the Yule Ball Hermione was described as "very pretty" Now all the primping in the world couldn't have made her look that good if she didn't have attractive features to start with. Make up can only do so much. Remember also both Krum and McLaggen were interested and neither seem the type to go for a plain girl.

The second is having courses tailored to career options like healer or auror. This goes against the entire spirit of the series in which Hogwarts is a fantasy version of a British secondary school, or at least the kind Rowling would have experienced as a teenager. So we have OWLS istead of O Levels and NEWTS istead of A Levels. Now if you plan to be a doctor you would certainly take A Level chemistry but while that course might cover aspects of pharmacology relevent to an advanced general knowledge of the subject, a formal study of pharmacology would wait until you started your medical training.
The same would apply at Hogwarts. If you decide to be a healer you would need NEWT Potions , but while Healing potions would be covered in the course a detailed study of them would wait until you begin your formal training after school.
This was made pretty clear in Harry's career's advice in OotP. He was told the NEWTS he would need to become an auror (with no mention they would be specialised for his career choice)but also that there would be a lot of further study after he finished school.

it is a good story and I do like it, but for the second point alone I don't think it meets your stated onjective of being consistent with canon

Bleh I really am so tired of Ron's pity party...they shoudl dump his worthless ass if all he'll do is much stuff up.

No...just god no Weasleys....ugh....ugh...ugh.



Thanks for writing,
Matt

why dont you post chapters and update your story as you write/type the chapters?

i posted the below comment

why dont you post chapters and update the story as you write them?

A very intriguing argument. I really like this story. keep up the good work.

but hermione didnt answer the question i guess since she did in a way by kissing harry but that was only after ron came in the room, so if he didnt who knows if she wouldve kissed harry, and she still didnt answer the question if she fancys ron but mayb theres a flashback of that in ur next chapter so udpate soon this story is great so far!

“I want you to do the same for Ron this year that you did for me during the Triwizard Tournament,” Harry said.

hmmm idk thats to much alone time between ron/hermione
i really cant wait for this story to move on further into the storyline cuz i have bad ideas of like wat might happen like hermione and harry breakin up and ron and hermione getting together and harry and ginny getting together with all these like hermione training ron and harry helpin ginny out, cant wait to c wat happens update soon

Well, the main reason that Harry and Hermione did not get together is, as JKR said herself, "It was too obvious!"

She actually said that about the Hermione and Ron thing back in the year she wrote book 3, saying that "A Hermione and Harry relationship is WAAAAAAAY too obvious, in my opinion."

It was the wrong opinion.... but such is how empires fall.

Nice chapter, though I must say I'm a little brashed off the way Hermoine just walked out on Harry in your flash back. Seems to me she just used Harry to get back at Ron. So is she going to concede to Ron as a lost cause and then take Harry as the concilation prize? I'm guessing this will be cleared up later on but it just comes across as a very cold and calculated thing Hermoine did with no reason given to Harry.

Your note at the end of the chapter raises some good questions with the book and characters. However, JKR has said in so many interviews that in her world it's Ron and Hermoine. So that leaves us to conclude the JKR is realy that thick when it comes to friendship and romance.

Don't get me wrong here, I'm in total agreament with you regarding Harry and Hermoine, I just see the writing on the wall from the Grand Poobah herself (JKR) and know in her fanfic universe things just plain suck!

So this leaves me with many other wonderful universe's to choose from, one of them being yours. I just hope that after DH authors like yourself do not stop in creating the "AU" world just because some thick headed woman in Scotland puts an end to her universe.

Thanks for the update and looking foward to see how you play out Hermoine's actions from the flashback.

I loved your version so much! When I read it in HBP, I felt like someone ripped my heart out. Is it wrong to want the best for charaters you love and want the best for them and feel dismayed when their hurt?

I hope that you don't have Ron and Ginny trying to make some sort of a move on Harry and Hermione during these tutoring sessions...because frankly that would be...unpleasant to read.

The Harry and Hermione you've shown us thus far, well they seem rational and logical enough that they could head such a thing off at the pass, but we shall see soon enough.

Thanks for writing,
Matt

Awesome.
I remember that Hair Scent scene in your flashback is when I noticed something was seriously off with Book 6.
It is always good to explain a bit of everyday Wizard life, most importantly the limits of magic.

Looking forward for more

Interesting read mate, very interesting. I reserve my judgement till I read more from you. Keep up the good work.