Wow! Despite the long paragraphs and the errors I spotted (that you mentioned), this was an amazingly powerful story. I stopped breathing at certain points due to the sheer power you give Hermione's words.
Definitely adding this to my favorites!  |
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Even though this story spans the time of one night, it has great depth. I love Hermione's brave speech that laid bare the growth of her feelings toward harry. It was exactly as I think Hermione would have said it which means logical, detailed and completely understandable with no part left unexplained.
I think that this does fine as a stand alone story even if you wrote it as a part of a bigger piece (although I would love to read the bigger piece if you regain a desire to finish it) |
Author Feedback: I've always felt Hermione would fall off her rails at one point and lose it - with respect to dealing with Ron and with respect to protecting Harry. Especially as his "doom," so to speak, approaches. This is exactly as I see her. Bless her devoted and somewhat tightly wound little heart. 
I wish I had the time/will to finish the story. It was really good...in my head.
Thanks so much for reading and taking the time to review. It is much appreciated.
Happy holidays! |
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Okey doke.
I completely withdraw all of what I said with my last review.
Bloody brilliant, eh? Now give us MORE! |
Author Feedback: You gave me a good laugh the day I read your two reviews. Thanks for that!
And thanks for reading and taking the time to review. Sorry about the formatting mess. It gives me a headache just thinking about it. And I apologize for taking so long to respond.
This story was a bunch of good ideas (I think), but life derailed my progress and then HBP happened.  I was only too happy to share the bits I could.
Thanks again, and happy holidays! |
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The effort is apparent, as is the generally cohesive overall storyline.
However, it also becomes rather apparent that you need someone to beta this. It's a good intent, but you're missing on some spelling and grammar, which would greatly enhance your story. |
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::chokes and dies:: I don't have any more words than that. Beautiful, the whole thing. Soothed my HBP-bruised HHr muscle completely. Loved it so much. |
Author Feedback: Ha! I know how you feel. Sorry it's taken so long to respond, but thank you for your review and your kind words.
Happy Holidays! |
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skyaceSigned | Chapter : 2 | Date : 19/10/05
I don't know how else to say this, but you are the most touching and funny harmony fanfic writer I've read by far - please come back 
The thing that ilovemagic said about Emma is true and given everything I've read online I have no doubt that HMS Harmony will sail into the starry night.
JKR is a master of facades, at first read, HBP seems to set HMS Harmony on fire, but like your depiction of Ron's date with Hermione, the trio needs to venture out to discover themselves in canon. She's set HP up perfectly for Harmony and I can't believe she'd just throw it away.
I'm new to HP (only read the series for the first time in the past week), but I started reading all your fics and I couldn't stop because they rang so true!
I hope you'll grace us with your muse once more someday!    |
Author Feedback: I'm cutting and pasting this line...How rude of me not to respond until now. My only excuse is that life has been insane and unfriendly this year...because I feel bad about taking so long to respond.
I very much appreciate your review and your enthusiasm. Given that you were new to the HP phenomenon back in October, I wonder how you're feeling about it now...post-GoF and having let it all sink in. I hope you're enjoying yourself.
Thanks for all your kind words.
Happy Holidays! |
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Danielerin, please come back - you were not wrong about H/Hr.
Jo is emulating the trickery in Emma - she's got the same kinds of deceptions all set to unravel in book 7. So don't jump ship now!
Emma was written in 3 parts. HBP is like being at the end of part 2 in Emma, where everything looks like it's going the wrong way. Part 3 starts with Emma pondering how to handle Frank Churchill's return. Her attachment to him has "subsided to a mere nothing - it was not worth thinking of". But he had undoubtedly been the one of the two most in love, so she would have to be careful to avoid encouraging him. WRONG! He's been engaged to Jane Fairfax all along! And she doesn't yet have a clue that she loves Mr. Knightly, and must be the only one to marry him.
Jo has set up the same type of deceptions. Emma is her favorite book, and what she called "the best twist ever", and "the target of perfection". Having perfectly set up the trio for the same type of deceptions, how could she not execute it? The assumed or expected relationships are all from ambiguous, you-draw-the-conclusion wording, just as Austen intentionally did in Emma. All the "anvils" can be taken at least two ways. The Interview was more ambiguous, you-draw-the-conclusion wording, so we'd all be looking at the optical illusions one way, only to be told, ha! it was the other way! in book 7, because "readers like to be tricked". Notice there are no future-tense statements about relationships.
I'm convinced this is what she doing. Please, don't stop writing - you had it the right way.
If you're in doubt, look at the text of HBP, and even at The Interview, and list what you can be absolutely certain about for book 7. You'll have a short list, if anything.
Missing your stories, and hoping to see you on Portkey again. ilm
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Author Feedback: How rude of me not to respond until now. My only excuse is that life has been insane and unfriendly this year.
Thank you for taking the time to try to convince me that book 6 was just a bad dream and a bump in the road. I hope you are right, but I'm not going to lose sleep over it. I have enough problems. 
Happy Holidays! |
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AnonymousUnsigned | Chapter : 2 | Date : 19/09/05
"There is no greater feeling in the world than to be loved by Hermione Granger."
Oh man, that line got to me; it's so true, there isn't. Ms. Rowling should at least make a memoir of that somewhere in the last book. We all know Harry need Hermione no matter what other standards are involved but he doesn't seem to realize it. And the way she is in HBP...well, I don't know. I'm beginning to lose faith in J.K Rowling. I can understand why you might not be writing HP anymore, but if you were do. I'll look forward to it. |
Author Feedback: How rude of me not to respond until now. My only excuse is that life has been insane and unfriendly this year.
Just know that I truly appreciate your review. We seem to be in agreement about the series' foundational friendship. Too bad we can't get the author to agree.
Happy Holidays! |
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bradSigned | Chapter : 2 | Date : 04/08/05
My goodness I enjoyed the new 'extra footage', thanks for the bonus, it really is an excellent little mini-ficlet. Although short it has a lot of 'movement' and transitions to keep the reader fully engrossed ... Hermione's initial 'smarty-pants' attitude, then her rage (swear words even the more effective because she's the "language, Ron!" girl from canon (I think; I get confused with fan fiction sometimes)), and then Harry's support and defense of her, *so* much needed and welcomed by the reader. Followed by the Trio bit at Hagrid's hut, another transition to a nice coda.
The bit that really excited me in this mini-story, though, was Hermione's message to Voldemort via Malfoy that he "made a mistake" in letting her live and that she would see them all "destroyed". My anger that Malfoy was still successfully bribing corrupt ministry officials for his freedom was instantly replaced with chilled anticipation.
I know I've compared one of your other stories to Funvince's "Hermione's Change". This time his "You have Always Believed Me" just shot into my brain and took up residence (again). In that story Harry tells Hermione that she could be Minister of Magic or "take over the world" if she wanted to ... that she "bows to no one". Ever since I read that story I've longed to read something which really explores that theme, of Hermione going all out, using that formidble intelligence to take down her and Harry's enemies. It *is* in canon where Ron has remarked that she "scares him sometimes"? Reading your story here woke up my greed for such a tale all over again; Hermione and Harry, side by side, equal partners, waging a proactive war against the bad guys.
Anyway, I thought those threats from her in your story were perfectly in place - she's always supported Harry in his fight, but the fight has always been exactly that - *his* - until a) her parents are killed and b) Malfoy's threat against Harry pushed her past her limits.
I enjoyed "The Gift" itself also, particularly the first D.A. part. At long last that complete and utter support of Harry we 'deluded' people saw in the first five books is given voice for all to see! Poor Hermione.
Your muse hasn't quite abandoned you yet Jane! |
Author Feedback: Brad! How the hell are you?! I feel like it's been years. How's the winter down under?
I was so happy to see your review...you'd think I could have responded a bit sooner, but you always put so much into it that it takes me a while to find the time to respond in kind. It's such a treat to respond to a reviewer who takes such an interest in your story.
I'm glad you enjoyed my version of 7th year Hermione. She is certainly different from JKR's version. I always knew that I would take Hermione farther than JKR - making her more of Harry's equal, but I never thought that our paths would be so divergent. Still smarting from that one, I guess.
Since talking with you about him, I've read Funvince's stories at PK. I'm thinking there must be more on ff.net, because I don't think I saw "You Have Always Believed Me." He's good, and I particularly enjoyed his parody - Hermione questioning JKR.
The Hermione of books 1-5, IMHO, would grow to be a force to be reckoned with. That's why people enjoy Lori Summers's PoU stories or AngieJ's (a/k/a Ebony) Paradise Lost - because Harry is every bit the dashing hero you would suspect and HERMIONE KICKS ASS. And Ron is still important and funny, but even he fares better in their stories than in JKR's. My newest theory is that she got jealous on Harry's part that people enjoyed Hermione (and to a lesser extent, Ron) so much so she made them look like fools and Harry look pretty picture perfect. The Ginny thing still baffles me, though. That came out of left field.
The biggest disappointment is that Hermione had that potential - and was the lone strong female character - and this female author blew it. As a woman, I can tell you that that really bothers me. I know Harry is the ultimate hero, but wouldn't he look even more heroic if he was a bit more "every man" like? Like Lord of the Rings...the story of how a common person can do uncommon things...but always with a whole lot of help.
Oh, Brad...I could go on and on and I need to just get over it.
So...that raging Hermione in the Room of Requirement...that's what I saw happening to her after all the years of looking after him...after all the struggles and adventures and threats and everything coming to a head their seventh year...after all the putdowns and prejudices she's endured...I just always had it in my head that she would eventually explode and her devotion to him would become apparent to everyone who was too thick to notice it before. Of course, Ron is the perfect outlet for all that, given their bickering past.
Guess I was dead wrong as to the direction. 
Don't care. Still think my interpretation more accurately reflects the material in the first five books.
And I'd debate her on it...no sweat.
Thank you for reading, Brad. Thank you for enjoying. Thank you for commenting and making me feel good. I hope that all is well out there in the land of Kangaroos. Drop me a note sometime. I'd be happy to chat about...just about anything! I love to ramble.
Take care!
jane |
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I loved the begining of that story! It's bloody fantastic!
Hermione is too hurt to be afraid, Harry has had enough and Ron is always Ron, bu the best of it all is that good old Dumbledore is here. or when Malfoy said 'the old man' he meant someone else?
The characters are more sarcastic and I love it.
Amazing story. I hope you continue it. |
Author Feedback: No, you were right about Dumbledore. This was written before HBP, after all.
I'm glad you liked what you saw. There's actually more that I'd already written, but it doesn't flow very well, so there's no point in posting them. Not inspired to write HP works when the canon of book 6 makes me ill to think about.
But I love Portkey and all of its wonderful members. Thanks for reading and reviewing. It is greatly appreciated.
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minaUnsigned | Chapter : 1 | Date : 27/07/05
noooooooooooooo please don't go, i love ur fic!! there amazing works. I know i had to stop readin HBP half way...and contuied reading for the whole voldi thing and nothing else. and hoenstly i found only the first quarer of the book good. hhaa i think jk should stop with the romances since she sucks with them. i mean the h/g was just chopped in, it didn't flow, and i personaly don't like this book. and right now i don;t like JK for taking away one of my fav fic writers! i don't care wat book 7 or six says, it will always be h/hr so keep ur chin up. haha i still found h/hr moments in book 6 i bet u down the road harry and hermione will end up with each other. |
Author Feedback: Your optimism is inspiring, but I don't think well founded. Still, you can make of it what you will. That's the fun of it. Unfortunately, I am too stuck to canon to deviate. Therefore, it's less painful if I just bow out.
Will always keep an eye on Portkey, though. The best HP site there is!
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AnonymousUnsigned | Chapter : 2 | Date : 26/07/05
Another good one from u! Now to read the next or i ight die! |
Author Feedback: Thanks for your enthusiasm! I appreciate the feedback.
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ReaUnsigned | Chapter : 1 | Date : 26/07/05
I have hope that in the next book Ron will forget Hermione and Harry will get a chance! I think we my have hope yet. JKR dose surpires us alot. First its Cho now Ginny! Next HERMIONE!! I have to hope. But I think i`ll just ignore it if it gose wrong in the next book. Just form it the way i want it! |
Author Feedback: That's the right attitude! Unfortunately, I'm not that type of reader. I'd always have it nagging at me in the back of my brain. Oh, well. I hope YOU enjoy it.
Thanks for reading.
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spaz141Signed | Chapter : 1 | Date : 26/07/05
Intense and lovely. Thanks for writing. You will be missed. Sincerely, Cheryl |
Author Feedback: Thanks, Cheryl. I appreciate your feedback. I'll miss it, too.
jane |
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You see - by writing in that extra bit, you have to know you're only making us want more!!!
Bloody tease!! Oh there is so much more I could say.... but I'll just sit here, holding my tongue you evil, eeeevvvuuuhhhl wench!!
Surely you must know by know that I will simply have to pester you to write the rest of this out. See, even tho it's all AU now, and I know how you abhor AU - you've still managed to find the best part of that voice - that unintentional, wonderfully written subtext that we all fell in love with. You have that voice now, despite the fact that she's obviously murdered it within herself, and, as they say, with great power comes great responsibility...
*laughs*
Hell - it's your story here babe, and, as people have been screaming in our ears of late, you can do whatever you like with it. But I know that you know what great potential lies here, and I just want you to explore that. Maybe not today or next week, but as the muse strikes you, 'cause what you have thus far is brilliant, and it deserves to see the light of day as an entire fic, rather than simply scenes from the great unfinished story...
Of course, you've seen my scenes, so I should talk... *laughs*
But hey - you finish yours and I'll finish mine!
Perhaps I can bribe you with some more artwork... |
Author Feedback: *sighs* Yeah, I liked this story, too, even though I didn't know how to sew it all together. Oh, well. Maybe the muse will strike, but I don't see it happening right now.
Thanks for always being there to read and review and kick my ass. It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it.
Good luck to you and our twisted sisters on your upcoming projects. Can't wait to see them!
*hugs*
j. |
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