Nice job, great writing. But I feel the humble punctuation mark referred to here is the wrong one.

The angst-ridden moment she experiences when he is away can't possibly be a comma in the sentence that is their life together.

A separation claiming to be a comma would not rob either party of his or her peace of mind. Rather it would give breath. It would give minds pause to think. We would imagine commas in HHr's life to be healthy, and the opposite, a romance that defied punctuation, to be unlikely. Hermione declaring without commas -- "Harry we love each other and belong to each other let's don't ever hurt each other Harry let's don't ever leave each other" -- would have us breathless (gasping) but skeptical.

The separation described here sounds more like the period at the end of a sentence, with all the uncertainty it suggests about whether there is anything more to come. "No iron can pierce the heart with such force as a a period put in just the right place," wrote Isaac Babel.

In any case, this is a nicely rendered story. Thank you for sharing.

Beautiful work you did here, i like the fact that you don't explain things much, you just leave it for the reader to interpret or imagine and that's quite wonderful. Hope you'll write more fics like this in the future

Another beautiful story, full of depth and innuendoes and images and emotions. It's heartbreaking, yet you know there's hope. I know, after reading your works, I think I'll go for laughs after this, just to lighten my cracking breaking tender bruised heart.

Wow, beautifully written. I loved the analogy of the commas. I've never thought of them like that, and I don't think I'll be able to look at a comma the same way ever again. The poor girl, worrying about him for days like that. And then him thinking of that little girl like her. It was lovely when she understood right away what he was thinking. The “But I’m here,” was beautiful; I was already aww-ing by that point, but that just increased it ten-fold. Really, a beautiful, well-crafted story!

absolutely brilliant. there are so many things that are going on here. i thought at first that maybe harry had died but then everything clicked after a few more paragraphs. amazing writing. so many details are given - not forcefully but easily like breathing. i love how it flows. hermione stresses from worry over harry being called out, harry comes back and he is her sustenance and her his. they aren't able to function without each other. amazing writing. awesome.
melissa
acoustics
pounding_silence@yahoo.com

Again, beautiful, and not just simply beautiful, but the kind of beautiful that makes you sigh and prop your head up with your hand and just stare out into space. I really envy your talent.

This is abstract. One has to fill in the blanks with one's own interpretation/imagination of things.

Readers who prefer straightforward plotlines may not like this kind of story.

But again, I think you are very good with descriptions of emotions/feelings. I totally feel myself get wrapped up in this story.

But after this, I have to go read something happy. I don't want this heaviness in my heart to stay too long. It tends to make me dark and brooding.

This fic is simply beautiful. A lot of peoplesay that one of the reasons they like H/Hr is the great "epic" love. You've shown that even in the most everyday actions, their love is amazing.

Your stories hold a truly rare treasure, non physical intimacy between Harry and Hermione, so much so that it makes it beautiful to read. It's so enjoyable because you take the time to write their relationship, write about how it works, what they face, the SIMPLE things they do. Those precious moments readers are often defied because of the lack of storyline but that at the same time are as important as the story itself because they're what form the relatiosnhip between charcters. And this is just a true treat to read, i LIVED every one of your stories and believe me, that doesn't happen often. You're a wonderful writer, please keep writing.

Your stories hold a truly rare treasure, non physical intimacy between Harry and Hermione, so much so that it makes it beautiful to read. It's so enjoyable because you take the time to write their relationship, write about how it works, what they face, the SIMPLE things they do. Those precious moments readers are often defied because of the lack of storyline but that at the same time are as important as the story itself because they're what form the relatiosnhip between charcters. And this is just a true treat to read, i LIVED every one of your stories and believe me, that doesn't happen often. You're a wonderful writer, please keep writing.

Very deep story. I loved it. I hope you write more stories like this.

This was a nice read, a bit sad but I enjoyed reading it. Thanks for sharing!

Hunh. I love that this is a different sort of one-shot for a change - interesting, creative. Breaks up the monotony of 'Harry/Hermione Overused Cliches' a bit, which is nice.

Very well done!

I love this story! It was beautiful and very enjoyable to read. I hope you write more in the future!

this was beautiful! I loved reading it and once I staarted I couldn't stop! Great writing! Imaginative synonyms (sp?) if thats what theyre called. I loved it!